Tantra Techniques - Tantra Massage

  Pleasuring the Goddess
 Pam Babbitt, S.I.

What does a Goddess want? The answer is clear – she wants it all!
 

She wants your full presence and to know that she is the object of your greatest desire. She wants heart connection, soul connection, body connection. She yearns to have all her senses stimulated. She wants gentle light caresses that continue forever. At times, her body’s wisdom may suggest that it wants to be pampered into relaxation with no agenda for sexual arousal. She wants to know that you fully delight in pleasuring her, even when there is no reciprocity.

For ease in languaging, my words here pertain to hetero­sexual partners. I invite you to adapt these suggestions to your relationship wherever you are on the gender con­tinuum.

The first essential for Goddess Pleasuring is self-prepar­ation. How is your attitude? What is going on in your heart? If you are having difficulty perceiving your partner as a true Goddess, seeing her beautiful essence and cherishing all her radiant splendor, consider creating a force field. This energy concept is the gentler cousin of "having expectations." It asks you to step into your magnificent highest self. Connect with your heart and soul and move past imagining to true knowing that your partner is an incredible Goddess. This knowing will create a genuine wanting in you to serve her like a Goddess, connect with her divinity and smooth the path for her to more fully embrace that role. An open heart is essential for tantra massage.

Your Goddess wants her body to be fully cherished, in­cluding every wrinkle, scar, grey hair, stretch mark, extra pound or ounce of cellulite. When she feels your loving gaze, void of judgment, her heart will expand enabling her to more fully immerse in her sensuality and sexuality. Your total acceptance supports her in fully celebrating all that she is.

Your Goddess wants trust and intimacy and needs both to unreservedly receive your pleasuring. In order to fully welcome sensual discovery, a Goddess needs a heart connection; whereas a man can access more of his heart energy once he has been sexual. You may have experienced the confusion or conflict that this gender difference can create. Neither partner is wrong or living on another planet. The gift that this dissimilarity offers is the opportunity for communication, insight, and understanding. Intimacy (in-to-me-see) is happening.

Respectfully ask permission to sensually explore and pleasure your Goddess’s wonderful body and give her the gift of your full pres­ence. With tantra massage, the energy connection often starts through eye gazing, synchronized breathing and full attention to her body’s desires. Engage all of your senses as you smell her hair and skin, listen to her breathing and feel her various skin textures. Discover her body’s unique secrets and remember them. Her body has wisdom and knows what it needs. Listen and watch for the messages, match her energy and do not try to redirect the path. As she feels your presence and honoring, her trust level will deepen allowing her to totally surrender into receiving.

Your Goddess wants to experience all the facets of who you are. That entails accessing both your yin and yang energy. If you are showing up exclusively in your yang/warrior/stud energy you are withholding a precious part of yourself. Let her sense your softness, your vulnerability, your humanness and your open heart.

With tantra massage and pleasuring, heart energy trumps technique, and intuition trumps learned knowledge. Trust your intuition and go with the flow. Do not strive to follow a set routine. If you become concerned about your touch technique, visualize loving energy emerging from your heart, flowing through your right arm and hand and into your partner’s body. Now visualize her energy entering your left hand, traveling up your left arm and into your heart, where it merges with your heart energy. Let this energy flow through your right arm and into her body. Now you have created a circuit of heart energy. Energy is much more powerful and effective when it flows in a circuit, rather than as a one-directional arrow. Make an intention to access your heart energy with each breath.

Goddess pleasuring can add a sacred dimension to your relationship, deepen your heart connection, intensify the sensuality and build a firmer foundation for sexuality. Create anticipation, add variety, and enjoy the bliss!