Think Positive - About Life and Sex
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Dear Dr.
Patti,
My partner and I are splitting apart, it feels. Sex has fallen off
the radar screen. We spend hours focused on if we'll both lose our
jobs in this lousy economy and if so what will we do? We are both
walking wounded, worrying all the time if the other shoe is about to
drop financially. It affects our sex life like nobody's business.
Except yours, ha ha. We'd love to get some advice about how to stay
afloat in the bedroom, even if our stocks are tumbling.
Thanks,
Abundant Hope
Dear Abundant Hope,
As
I lectured at our recent meeting of the Los Angeles Sexologists'
Association (LASA), we have to think positively in these negative
economic times. What are some ideas? (These may not seem like answers to
your sexual woes, but trust me when I say that EVERYTHING CONNECTS).
Do positive affirmations each and every
day, like doing your PC exercises every day in the shower for
better orgasms, positive affirmations set your day with positive
intentions in motion and magnetize your dreams into
reality.
Say "I love you", or "I am loved just the way I am", or "I'm a desirable
successful person right now" to yourself in the mirror and watch for
results.
Hang out with positive people.
Get rid of the nay-sayers or doomsday predictors riding in your car or
screaming in your ears while they may be sitting on the couch next to
you, watching the chronic outpouring of bad news on the TV. Ahem. Change
the channel!
Change your diet of news.
Stop drinking in the morning, mid-day and evening news. First of all,
the newspapers are slipping away, and you can shift to online versions
for your news,
something you can govern in time spent and articles read. Do not, I
repeat, ever go to bed after watching the horrors of the day on the
late night news channel. How many tragic accidents, multi-billion dollar
bailout failures, or homicidal maniacs do you want to think about as you
drift off each night? Go to bed earlier for a little tendering instead
of waiting for the music of the "Tonight Show".
Read spiritual books, articles,
websites and emails. Develop
a habit of consuming input that sends hopeful, prosperity-laden and
upbeat messages into your brain. Google around for those. Go to Chellie and buy her book, "The
Wealthy Spirit" and be sure to sign up for her daily dosage of positive
thought about prosperity and money, which sails for free into your inbox
every day.
Get Linked. Join
Facebook,
Twitter,
Tagged,
Linkedin,
Plaxo, whatever means
you can find to join with others. This is the new world of connecting
with others for professional and personal visibility and potential gain.
Do it regularly. Use your cellular phone with camera to record and
upload the neat and fun times you are living, and share funny, moving,
beautiful, inspirational messages and images with everyone you know.
That is one excellent tool for boosting your smile factor.
Download happy audible programs
like from
Hay House
Radio, a few minutes of a bright outlook or a
metaphysical interpretation of what is ailing your mind today could
change your life.
Catch
yourself speaking about how bad things are. Unless you are
living in your car today or have lost everything in the last week or
have just received a terminal diagnosis, life is good. Claim it. Tell
yourself your own version of the "My good news today is..." and you'll
be fine. Share that message with your loved one(s) to keep the energy
flowing upward.
Find a spiritual center.
that
appeals to your BS, as in Belief System, whether it's yoga (that's my
path), or meditation, or the Catholic Church, or protestant services, or
Sufi dancing, or mysticism. Even a half hour spent watching a sunrise or
sunset will uplift your soul and shift your focus. Oh, and speaking of
dancing, movement of that body of yours helps a lot in the lifting your
spirits (and pounds off) departments.
Be
in gratitude. Thank your spouse for being a great partner,
even in down times. In fact, look at the positives of caressing, or
nurturing touch you can share together without investing one dime. Or
find creative new ways to release those orgasms. Give credit to yourself
for your accomplishments and what you give back to the world. Look
around your home with joy, appreciate your boss for keeping you
employed, and be thankful for all that is. If you're bankrupt in the
"thank you" department, this is a call for you to find something good to
give or be or do for others.
Use the extra time you now find in your
life,
(less time at work, loss of job, not working two jobs
like usual) and do something productive and creative. Include silly or
practical things, like taking sewing classes to make your own clothes;
or a make-up class to do it the way the pros do it; or learn a new
skill, such as carpentry, home or car repair or floral arrangement; get
retrained in your own career path or delve into something different,
such as becoming a certified fitness trainer or diving
instructor/lifeguard, or teaching inner school children about computer
skills development; free yourself to use this as an opportunity for
personal and career growth. If you are reading this, you use the
Internet; my goddess, there are literally thousands of free downloads
(think iPhone apps galore) to help you learn, grow and morph as you
weather these financial storms.
Remember in the I Ching, the coins for crisis = danger +
opportunity. That's us now.
