Embracing
(continued from previous page)
For the man/masculine/giver of the hug …
Bring yourself fully present to this moment, this other person.
Anchor your energies deep into the earth, and lightly flex your
knees, allowing for the stability and resilience of your stance. Let
the other lightly step into your field. Greet him/her with open arms
– your left arm reaching over their right shoulder, and your right
arm reaching around their left side. (This promotes natural
alignment of your two heart centers.)
If necessary, bend your knees to lower yourself, so they do not have
to crane or reach up. Help them to relax. Bring your awareness into
your hands, and place them lightly yet firmly on two chakra points
along their back. Generally, your left hand can fall naturally on
the back of the fourth (or heart center) chakra, and your right hand
on the back of the third (between the heart and the lumbar). Just
let your hands come to rest along the centerline of their body in
whatever way feels natural and appropriate. This allows the abundant
energies of the other person’s upper chakras to course through your
arms and be expressed through your right hand into one of their
lower chakras, which tend not to be as energetically supported.
Do not squeeze. Apply just enough of your presence to support
him/her in a way that feels solid yet light. If the other begins to
feel entrapped, the circuits cannot open. Allow for a spaciousness,
a lightness that promotes the natural flow of energies. And breathe
deeply. Don’t let your thoughts remain in your upper chest and head.
Allow your whole energetic field to participate in the hug. Offer,
unselfconsciously, all of your body as a resource for the other to
draw upon to whatever degree they desire. Do not push or impose.
Simply lay yourself open, available. You’re not just making your
body available to them (and, ultimately, yourself) – you are making
your body’s energies available.
As the embrace progresses, your hands may feel guided to rest on
different chakras (the left, for example, on the back of the neck,
and the right on the base of the spine). Allow your hands to be
guided by the energies; do not be self-conscious or restless with
your touch. And if it ever begins to feel unwelcome or like an
imposition, don’t do it! Keep your awareness present in your hands.
For the woman/feminine/receiver of the hug …
Gauge your trust in this person. If appropriate, say a quiet,
interior “yes” to this opportunity to open and accept, and step into
their arms. Rather than “hugging them back,” allow yourself to be
enveloped and held. Do not feel you have to do anything more than
stand present to their field of warmly penetrating acceptance and
affirmation.
Hold them in whatever way allows you to feel capable of utterly
relaxing and receiving their energies. You do not have to think
about reciprocating in order to reciprocate. Your energetic
circuitry does it without any willfulness or thought. So totally
relax. Feel the currents of energy in your chakras under their hands
… and among and between your other chakras as the energies begin to
flow. Imagine yourself in the arms of the divine or the Beloved – a
reflection of your own inner divinity – and melt into the moment
without letting your mind pull you into the past or the future.
And trust. Feel into the stillness, the silence. Feel into the
quieter dialogues and stirrings within your body. Do not pat their
shoulders after a couple of seconds and pull away! Indulge in the
moment, in the experience of being held and infused. This is your
birthright. This is worth a minute or two of unhurried dalliance.
Your greatest gift to Life, right now (including the person who is
holding you) is to soften, open, and receive. This is the innate
power of the feminine. This is the basis of generation, creation,
and birth. If you allow it, this hug can be all about energy.
Everything softens and melds. You and the other momentarily become
one and the same. Everything can be one.
If you feel a stirring in your heart, answer again with a quiet
interior “yes,” and allow the natural expression of your feminine
expressiveness to infuse your cells, your breath, your body.
Breathe. Let the other hold you quietly, as you feel into your own
aliveness and play with the threads and pulses of unaccustomed
pleasure. If you want to sigh, do so. No one is creating this
sensation but you. It belongs entirely to you, and is an offering to
all of Life. It is yours to choose, to cultivate, to release.
These “pointers” are simply a sketch, a map of possibility. Play
with them and see what becomes available for you. And whether man or
woman, once you’ve had a full experience of “the heartful embrace,”
you will never be careless with your hugs again!