Your Online Dating Profile

Judy Barton, Online Dating Coach

 
Marketing yourself in an online dating format can prove to be quite challenging. We are all very complex individuals and it is difficult to effectively state the intricacies of our total being in a few short paragraphs. Since your profile is essentially your first meeting, it is important to give serious attention to this aspect of your online dating experience. Taking care to choose the appropriate words and setting the right tone can offer a solution. How should the world view you? 

Your online portrait should appropriately state who you are and clearly define what you seek. Your profile is you, and needs to reflect your glowing, positive qualities. The energies you emit through your writing will attract like energies. The tone you set in the first couple of lines will determine your success. Stating yourself with confidence and enthusiasm will entice the reader and precipitate that same type of positive atti­tude in response. Adding a bit of intrigue and mystery will provoke a desire to know more.  

Your writing should be accurate, sincere and to the point. Any long-winded disser­tation will merely prove to deter interest. The addition of humor will impart warmth and offer insight into your personality and spirit. Creating a clever, whimsical intro­duction line that displays an engaging dis­position will extend an approachable aura. The goal is to attract attention and promote you as being a valuable asset. Offering the reader a pleasant place to visit while adding a smile to their day is always a positive and will inspire a call to action 

Be clear with regards to your likes and dislikes but don’t limit yourself with labels. Use a no-nonsense approach while offering a hint of your depth. Your statements should reflect exactly what you have to offer and what it is you are looking for, in short summary. Your profile need not display your life history or any negative aspects of your circumstances. Negatives are not attractive and showing your weaknesses places you in a vulnerable position from the start. Keep it real, effective and on the lighter side. 

Your objective is to avoid misrepresenting yourself and creating an atmosphere for potential misunderstandings. Clearly stating your limits and boundaries will speak to your strength and character.  (IE: Please do not respond if you are married, in town looking for a good time, live out of state, seeking cam sex or casual sex, etc). You can emphatically define those as an addendum rather than the foreword. Although it is important information to share, it is best to keep it separate from your list of endearing qualities and positive attributes. Be careful not to offer anything you cant’ or aren’t willing to do in reality. Leave little room for interpretation.  

Pictures add to the number of responses and interest but are not a necessity. Choosing to add a photograph to your profile should be based on your level of comfort and need for discretion. If your profile is well written and holds enough power, intrigue and mystery, it will command a response without a photo. Any picture you add should reflect the same qualities as your written word. Pictures with babies and animals are attention getters and present an endearing disposition. Far too many people display outdated pictures and misrepresent themselves in order to boost their contacts. That form of deceit may help to fill your email inbox but will not help in reaching your ultimate goal. 

The Internet brings us in contact with the world and offers endless opportunities. That type of exposure does not come without risks however. There are very specific rules for online dating and exposing yourself to the world through cyber space. When preparing your profile and in preparation for the online dating experience, it is wise to consider the risks and possible consequences. In that regard it is imperative that you avoid offering any personal information in your profile. It is wise to use an alternate email address and Instant Messaging screen name for dating contacts. When you feel comfortable moving to a telephone meeting it is best to give a cell number rather than your home phone number to better protect you.  Great adventures lie ahead if you are prepared and have planned well.